Prisoner

I can only watch
The world from here
Draw it in
To my magic circle
Piece by piece
Undo its contradictions
Structure, pattern it
Lay it out before me
In my cell.
I am not a conqueror
No traveller
I sit here and peer
At whatever comes my way
I draw it in
To my prison cell
Like a petty thief


Stella Trevin
March 1994

Alignment

I

I know two of you
A public
A private
One. A couple.

II

Double-faced
Accomplished monster
Of sorts.
Could you lie with me
Teach me that
One, too?

Stella Trevin
Winter1994

Musica selecta

Shall I compare her to a symphony?
He said: I hear the sound and melody
Of many instruments, but never see
The plan that brings this lovely tune to me.

Herself alone would be the leading theme
Strong, contained, and ever haunting me
I never listened to a song so sweet
The way all notes so intimately meet

And make a whole in perfect harmony
She knows the players, sees their streaks
The setup of the orchestra, the sleek
Performance of a passing violin, it keeps

Defying what I know for real:
A type of music I can only feel

Stella Trevin
Spring 2001

Closeness

April, but is it spring yet?
The snow hangs heavily
On the black and green branches
A bird scurries between the garbage cans.

You're sitting at my table, by the window
Reading one of my favorite books
The young light catches your golden hair
I need no longer search for your deepest self.

Most hidden is you face
You don't know how much I long for you
Your mind fixed on some other goal
How then my soul catches the essence of you.

You sigh and close the book again
Now we are together at the window
You say: April, you can tell by the light
And I've let go of you once more.

Stella Trevin
April 2001

Untitled

You are so many people: as I hear
you in some woman's footstep in the street
or in a sound of voices somewhere near
and hold my breath each time I think
somebody fits your shape; or when I see
your smile on someone else's face or in
their eyes, and feel you in a lover's touch.
I know you can't be here and yet I cling
in fragments to whatever seems to keep
your absence real. I wouldn't mind so much
to miss the whole of you nor feel so in-
complete, but for the stubborn part of me
that finds it's wholeness in a broken thing
and looks for you in everyone I meet.

Stella Trevin
Winter 1992

The Wizard She

High up stands the wizard
Mountain high
Thundering thundering
Words into space

O, the Wizard She!
With naked face she turns the tide

So far walks the wizard
Desert far
Striding striding
Kicking the sand

O, the Wizard She!
With naked hands she heaves the stars

So fast runs the wizard
River fast
Chasing chasing
Coursing the past

O, the Wizard She!
With naked feet she beats the path

Deep down goes the wizard
Sea deep
Diving diving
Into her sleep

O, the Wizard She!
With naked thighs she is clasping me


Stella Trevin
Winter 1992

Invitaton to dance

Can you hear my drum beat?
This tune, my loved one, is desire
Calling near. Devoid of words,
But speech at hart, does it not speak
To you? No mother tongue, say
Yours or mine, can strike its dire
Key at times at times it must be heard;
Too random is the pulse and sway
My pendulum of lust.Sound
Is motion darling, and I move
Faster as I lie and wait
For you to hear my fever pound.
Do get into my randy groove
Before the close, and get me laid?


Stella Trevin
Autumn1992

No title

I am

I am sorry.
But
I cannot be someone witch I am not
I cannot give you more than I have got
I gave you all, but it got lost
And it could never be enough

I love you
But
I am sorry
I am

Anniversary

Two births I celebrate today
The day you you came into this world
And started breathing, drinking in the life
That only you know how to live your way.

Two births I celebrate today
The first of looks that made us understand

The gentle touch, the way you held my hand
How only you know how to to love this way.

Two births I celebrate today
And human love, which gave you life
And fate, which brought you to my world
Where only you know how to find the way

Stella Trevin
Winter 1999

On love and war

Now you've hit me, and I hit you back.
What's left for us but retreat for good?
Why should I care who launched the first attack,
Or keep recalling how at last I stood -
Or stooped - and gave up on both war and peace,
And would not fight you up although I could,
Not wanting even for your blows to cease
And end it all? The thought of hurting you.
To feel my fist leap leap out to strike your face
Again and and see your eyes contract in pain
And watch you fall, is more than I can take.
For all my righteous anger I'm ashamed:
You struck the first one and the last,
How do absolve myself of what has passed?

Stella Trevin.

No title

You are so many people: as I hear
you in some woman's footsteps on the street
or in a sound of voices somewhere near
and hold my breath each time I think
somebody fits your shape; or when I see
your smile on someone else's face or in
their eyes, and feel you in a lover's touch,
I know you can't be hear and yet I cling
in fragments to whatever seems to keep
your absence real. I wouldn't mind so much
to miss the whole of you nor feel so in-
complete, but for the stubborn part of me
that finds its wholeness in a broken thing
and looks for you in everyone I meet.

Stella Trevin

After the movie

I see you nightly at my bed,
Ghost-faced. You never look
The same. I cannot reach you and
You have no hands, instead
you touch me coldly with an iron hook.

You've come to rip me up and turn
my insides out and tear my heart to shreds.
You've come to eat.

I know

Since we're apart each night
You'll come to slaughter me and smile
At me in greed. I'll learn how to expect
the pain of torture and my insane death,

But not

How it's inflicted this time or next
Or where to look, or when
You will appear. You never seem
The same.

It's that.
Not just the pain I fear.

Stella Trevin
1994